Have you ever wondered why sex is like a drug, why you feel addicted to your man or a little lightheaded whenever he whispers sweet nothings in your ear even if deep down you know he is a bit of a drop-kick? According to the April 29 2006 issue of New Scientist in a number of articles published under the heading ‘All about love’, love is a pattern of biochemical changes in the brain and “addiction” to a guy is one of those biochemical changes.
First, consider the female. According to Anderson and Middleton, the bond a mother has with her child is caused by the increased levels of oestrogen which boost the number of receptors for oxytocin in parts of the brain. Oxytocin is responsible for the mother becoming “addicted” to her children. Every time a woman sniffs her child she senses impending reward. This is unique to women. Here is where it gets interesting; the process is much the same when a woman has sex with a man; she experiences a rush of oxytocin and learns to sense impending reward each time she smells her lover.
Oxytocin levels rise during orgasm in women. Oxytocin also boosts trust and reduces activity in the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for the processing and memory of emotional reaction, making it easier to bond. Also, during physical contact and especially sex, the areas of the brain that are linked with negative emotions and risk assessment switch off. Before sex a woman is blissfully complacent. Soon after she becomes clingy and protective, much like a mother with her child. She becomes addicted to someone she may not particularly like and feels compelled to be around him, to take care of him and to protect him. The same hormones that make a woman a good mother, make a woman a clingy partner. This is why it is nearly impossible for women to have sex like a man and why so often I hear men complaining about women who say things like ‘I can’t keep seeing you otherwise I’ll get attached’!
Images courtesy of The Nervous Breakdown and Brain Ethics
Thanks for posting about this, I would love to read more about this topic.
While I feel that you may of placed a few interesting points on your article, I feel it is greatly simplified, especially the bio chemical aspect. It is also exceedingly more complex on a psychological manner, where various factors are involved that you clearly decided not to mention. Might I add that men also receive levels of Serotonin and Dopamine during orgasm, a “feel good, hypothalamus related neuro-chemical drug”, yet I don’t see the title “Why it’s impossible for both genders to have casual sex” and clearly that seems obvious, it happens frequently. Might I state that it might be that a woman is looking for affection and compassion in a lonely world, regardless of the sources intent, and not just “sniffing” oxytocin during sex. May I state that if you wish to make such a head grabbing title to an article, you might want to spend more time investigating the facts.
To address all aspects of sex would be impossible but thanks for your thoughts. It is certainly true that both men and women experience a rush of serotonin and dopamine during orgasm, which muddies their judgment. It is also true that many women are looking for companionship regardless of the source and will have sex with a drop-kick knowing he is a drop kick. I also agree that casual sex might be a form of compromise for both people. However, the higher levels of estrogen in women cannot be disputed and the purpose of my post was to encourage women to be aware of their bodies and hormones so they can make wiser decisions about their sexual partners. If women are able to pre-empt the (sometimes unexplainable) sense of longing or “addiction” experienced after sex, a sense of longing that is linked to the maternal instinct, then perhaps they will be able to control their behaviour more successfully or at least understand themselves better.